Dainty Cadaver Playwright Profiles: MARC SPITZ (Team C)

This week, we're running a series of profiles of the playwrights for Piper McKenzie's Dainty Cadaver 2012, in which they fill in the blanks in a number of outlandish and unhelpful statements we have provided.

Since emerging in 1998 on the Ludlow Street scene centered around Todo Con Nada, Marc Spitz has written and co-produced a dozen plays including Retail Sluts, The Rise and Fall of the Farewell Drugs, …Worry, Baby, I Wanna Be Adored, Shyness Is Nice, Gravity Always Wins, Your Face Is A Mess, the holiday short “A Marshmallow World” (which premiered at The Brick as part of The Baby Jesus One Act Jubilee: Second Coming in 2007), Up For Anything, and the forthcoming P.S., It’s Poison. Thanks to Jeff and everyone at The Brick for another seriously fun challenge.

1. The playwright whose work I’d most like to continue in my own words is JONATHAN LARSON because I DON’T REMEMBER THE EAST VILLAGE, DRUGS AND WALLET CHAINS QUITE THAT WAY.
   
   
2. I think that theater in this country needs more CHONG and less CHEECH.
   
   
3. If I could steal one character from another play and put them in my own play, it would be PALE from BURN THIS because I WOULD FINALLY HAVE A HERO WHO IS A SPRINGSTEEN FAN.
   
   
4. Some would describe me as the bastard love child of JOE ORTON and CAROL BURNETT.
   
   
5. At times I BARK at TOURISTS between HUDSON AND BLEECKER enforcing A SENS OF bathysphere-LIKE PRIVACY AND AVOIDING collateral INTRUSION for THE SAKE OF PETE and also GIRDING THEM in case of TERROR SINCE HIPPIES CARRYING dandelions ONLY TOIL for profit.
   
   
6. HIGH SCHOOL IS OVER AND Dainty Cadaver IS THE NEW DETENTION.
   
   
7. The one thing I think it’s important for audiences to know about me is I’M PURE EVIL.